And you think you're annoyed over the recent spate of 1-800-CALL-ATT
commercials featuring the red-haired Carrot Top? The FBI recently
put out an APB for the comedian, wishing to use him as a secret
weapon in Afghanistan. Operation Carrot Top will include the
dork trying to flush remaining "evil-doers" out of
evil-doers emerge from the caves, Special Forces will make sure
they are equipped with just enough bullets to make sure we never
have to witness a 1-800-CARROT TOP commerical ever again.
Fresh from his home-away-from home (rehab), actor Robert Downey
Jr. is back in action starring in the film Six Bullets From
Now. Which can only mean one thing: The director who hired
him must need a good connection. In lieu of the thespian's troubles,
the craft service table will be without it's usual supply of
crack, dope and heroin. Instead the table will feature only
peanuts, pretzels, donuts, snack bars, and a direct hotline
to the Betty Ford Center.
Sex in the City
Well I really wanna win one again.
Samantha: Oh, puhleeze, honey, it's only a contest.
Charlotte: I won the Most Likely to Succeed with Men Award in
Amanda: How can that be?
Charlotte: That's not nice.
Samantha: She wasn't referring to Trey, darling. Although I'm
sorry his penis didn't work out for you. I think she means that
"success with men" is what I do well.
Carrie: Yeah. If you call success not letting the door hit you
on the ass right after the sweat dries.
Samantha: Oh, you're just bitter because you're not going to
win a Golden Globe.
Carrie: No, I always win. I'm just bitter because you have yet
to catch an STD. I have sex with one guy, one guy, and it seems
like I always have a crab farm for Show & Tell.
Oh honey, don't feel bad. I don't get the crabs...I get the