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Comic Sundial says

10. The second installment of American Idol could get really stale.

9. Because we want to! (There! Take that! We are number 1! Boo yah! In your face, dawg.)

8. One Evildoer in the bush is like two scum-sucking maggots in the....

7. We need to build bigger SUVs!

6. So the rest of the world knows--Don't f*ck with Texas!

5. Post 9-11 TV "experts" dying to prove they know so much more.

4. Mr. Compassionate Conservative George Bush knows that what the world needs now is love sweet love and the only way to get it is to bomb the crap out of someone.

3. Osama? What Osama? Never heard of him.

2. We've been through the desert on a camel with no name--with AK-47s and laser-guided missiles--and we still didn't get the mo'fo the first time around.

1. Because Dubya's dad couldn't beat anyone up!
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